May…

May….?

How is it already the end of May?! I really thought I’d put more blogs out by now. While driving home from my practice today, I caught myself thinking, “How is the day already over?”

Lately, I’ve been juggling one extreme to the next throughout my adult endeavors. Studying, working, coaching, commuting, and squeezing in my fair share of fun when I can. Now the sun is setting around 8 PM and I don’t have to think about schoolwork again until August. This spring has been a treat. 

I love coaching at this time of year, even though everyone’s allergies are waging war. The players have really been developing week-to-week, it’s so rewarding. This is also my first season working with a high school team. Which has been a serious challenge, but one that’s brought so many positives. (I applaud high school teachers, this task is not for the weak). 

The nonprofit is bouncing off the walls. There, I work alongside incredibly passionate people who are aligned with our mission. This shared energy is refreshing.

It can be hard to keep track of it all, yet so fulfilling. I’m still not entirely sure what I want from my life. But at the moment I am doing everything I would ever want to be.

The Matter of it All

It amazes me, how every career-question is centered around the idea of “what’s next”.

What are your goals with the company? Do you have a 5-year plan? What are your plans after graduation?

It feels as though we’re never allowed to be fully present, always moving toward the next thing. Maybe this notion for productivity stems from the survival instinct, and it’s a reflection on today’s world. We are always so onto the next we forget to think about the now.

And in that now we forget to remind ourselves of why we’re in the current place we are. We lose sight of why we’re here, what led us here, and what it all means in the bigger picture. Right now, I feel very lucky. I get to do things I genuinely care about and enjoy. I also appreciate the fact growth is not a linear process. It’s made me stronger, pushed me out of my comfort zone, helped make me aware of the potential I have, and best of all I get to pass this empowering feeling down to the athletes I coach. 

On the other hand, the athletes also remind me how capable I am. During a tournament this past weekend the U10 girls on the bench asked me, “How do you even do all of this?” For a moment I was emotional, because they believe in me the same way I believe in them. But not only has my journey given me the benefit of teaching the youth (and the approval to yell when they don’t listen), it also has allowed me to meet so many cool people.

Can’t Pour From an Empty Cup

Once a stranger, now a really dear friend of mine, always reminds me, “you can’t pour from an empty cup.”

It’s a saying I think about often, especially after last week’s chaos.

Work was stacked, I had forgotten to eat lunch most days, schedules were changing, sleep felt like more of an option than a necessity, and time was spinning out of my control. By Friday night, I was ready to crashout. There was still a full Saturday and Sunday of coaching to do. Everything felt so out of control. I love what I do, but even passion can begin to drown you if you don’t come up for air. 

Our lives are go-go-go, constantly moving, where we frequently forget to pause for a moment and invest in ourselves. 

Filling our own cups can be done through a range of ways. Exercising, going to see a movie, practicing your skincare routine, meditating, making yourself a homemade dinner, whatever makes you feel more you. Life can become so heavy and overwhelming, we forget about the small things that make it all worthwhile. 

For me, my cup is full when I get to spend quality time with my friends and family. It doesn’t really matter what I’m doing – what matters is who I’m doing it with. 

The treasure I have been lucky to find is the people. The ones who show up, who make you laugh, listen to you rant about your day, praise your hustle, and push you to do more. They show you how full of life you are and that your job is not the only one using that energy. 

It’s funny, when I visit one of my best friends in New York even though the commute is long and the city truly never sleeps – I feel so rejuvenated when I return home. The time spent with my best friends helps me stay grounded, reset, and feel like myself again. 

Sometimes we tend to underestimate how valuable it is to experience our lives with people. These moments with others can be positive, sometimes they can be negative, but we get to hold onto a lesson, a laugh, a crazy story to share for years, and the memory of an experience we wouldn’t have without them (or you for that matter). 

And following along with the thoughts of people, there are all the ones whom we spend hours upon hours collecting separate paychecks with. If we’re lucky enough, we actually really like those people too.

The People we Keep

With coaching, they’re the ones who enjoy the crazy hours, standing out in the rain, and believing in the kids we teach more than we believe in ourselves sometimes. At the nonprofit, they’re the ones who would give you the shirt off their back, effortlessly putting everyone else before themselves, a subtle reminder of good and kindness in the world. In my classes, they’re the ones chasing knowledge, working toward a degree to help create something bigger for themselves. 

I have worked with a lot of different people – from restaurants and camps to a college TV Station, country clubs, and other random stops along the way. Not all of them are keepers, there are many coworkers I have grown apart from, but I am lucky enough to still keep in touch with quite a few. 

Last summer, I worked at an Oyster truck with a girl, let’s call her Toni. Many summer days you thought we wore grease as perfume, filling slow shifts with conversations about everything and nothing. We fell out of touch once the truck closed for the year, but since it reopened, we’ve been able to reconnect and it’s like no time has passed at all. It feels like we picked up right where we left off. 

There aren’t too many Toni’s we come across throughout our working lives, but when you find one, they remind you how connection can be easy, honest, and lasting – even through time spent apart.  

Funny enough, I would have never met Toni if a friend from high school did not tell me about the job opening. And I would have never inquired about the job if I wasn’t fired from my last restaurant gig. The world has a funny way about timing, and the doors it opens and closes. 

There are a handful of places I have been lucky enough to go to, people I have had the pleasure to meet, and there are still so many more waiting for me.

The Places I Have Gotten To Go

I think my 5-year plan will be a continuous dance of trial and error. Learning, failing, trying again – and meeting a lot of wonderful people along the way. 

I’ve been fortunate to meet people from all walks of life. Unintentionally, I’ve learned so much from many of them. And I think most are unaware of the value they’ve added. So if I see or talk to you often enough this message is for you:

Thank you for keeping me curious and expanding my perspective. Thank you for being genuine, kind, and present. Thank you for providing valuable memories and helping me explore all the possibilities life has to offer. Thank you for challenging me and teaching me life lessons. More than anything, thank you for being here, I really appreciate your time. 

The whole discovering purpose initiative can seem so vague and unachievable. But maybe a big part of the purpose is simply making the best of what’s in front of us. As I mentioned earlier, filling your cup looks different for everyone. I share my fill because I think it’s one we often overlook or forget to invest in. 

Even just yesterday, I ordered something different at my regular coffee spot, and the baristas didn’t recognize the order was mine. I didn’t even know they knew who I was. But little moments like that remind me, we make an impact even when we aren’t aware of it.

Life moves very fast (friendly reminder: it’s almost June). There are people we move through life with too, some we keep and others we don’t. The memories we gather along the way, the ones that fill our cups, are the ones we need to hold dear to our hearts. They remind us of who we are, and help us keep going. 

Until next time,

Amelia